Today’s topic is sex after 50. I am sure everyone has an opinion and my hope is that after reading my perspective, others will share theirs, and I will be enlightened as to a different way to approach an essential part of life. Nothing is taboo here. With respect and honesty we will be able to explore all areas of sexuality and what a fulfilling sex life can be like with your partner. So, let’s begin.
Sex after 50 should really be about intimacy. Now I have some male friends who still believe it is still only about the stroke. And to be honest, the stroke is still an important part of sexual fulfillment. But I have learned that intimacy with your partner is the most desirable goal. As both men and women age fulfillment of the mind becomes more important than the body. Again, the physical release of an orgasm is the gift of life but, but being in tune mentally is more important. The old saying, “I have to make love to your mind before I even touch your body” is still true. Some call it the mind-fuck. I agree with that term! Conversation with your partner is the ultimate form of intimacy. If we are able to relate on that level, then the physical act will meet our expectations. But we have to evolve to that level, particularly men! But, let’s talk about women for a moment.
My views are based on my life experiences, and I do not consider myself to be an expert. Any man who calls himself an expert on women is a fool. What I know is that women are emotional and emotion is the driving force of their sexuality. A woman must be emotionally connected to a man to be really into him sexually. By age 50 she has tried almost every way to connect to a man, be it all about sex or being into him for financial gain. By the age of 50 she is probably where she wants to be financially or has accepted her financial status in life. At this point the intimacy she craves is to be stimulated mentally. Now for some women it is still a learning time in life and that could be wonderful for the man she is with. By 50 the children are gone, and she is hopefully comfortable with her body. Sexual exploration could be the last frontier of human connection, and let’s face it, that is a gift she can share with her mate. But understand that the 50 year old is past the game playing and the man must understand this. If he does, he should sit back be prepared for a hell of a ride! Men at this age have slowed down.
Years ago, a friend told me that when a man’s dick no longer jumps at the sight of a nude woman, he is now ready to be faithful to one woman. That may be true, but now we have Viagra®, and he has the option to continue being a dog if he so chooses. Hopefully, the man has kept himself in shape because no woman wants a 2-minute man! By this age a man should have developed a desire to be mentally stimulated himself. The physical attraction of a beautiful woman is still strong but a mentally interesting woman can take you to a whole different level. So by 50 the man should have gone through all of the hoes he will ever need in life. An occasional slip-up is still possible because a man is a man. But mental connection should now be the motivator not a big butt and a smile.
My point is that one’s 50s can be the most sexually fulfilling time of your life. We should be comfortable in who we are and what we want in life. With this kind of comfort level, now is the time to fully explore all aspects of sexuality with your partner and be ready to find out if you really have some freak left in you!
